Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize
