I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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