i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Randomize
