Sry I called you an 8
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
