is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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