Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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