It's like a parade of train wrecks.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
