Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Randomize
