he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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