No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize