ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You may now shotgun with the bride
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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