We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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