Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
