I hate all girls vehemently.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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