is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
