You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
