She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
