before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
