2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
