We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
