Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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