please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize