he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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