Your face is a jimmy john
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize
