Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I cannot find my penis.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
