hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
