At least make sure they are 18
Why
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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