shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
