I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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