This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
