I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize