i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
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