I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
