What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
