Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
