i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
