Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
