My friends, they love my intelligence
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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