You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize