it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
