North Korea, Best Korea!
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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