Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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