She's JV to your varsity
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
