My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
