problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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