my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
