my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I deserve this hangover.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
