she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize