Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
someone owes me an orgasm
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
