if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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