yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
