You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
