What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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